April 5, 2017
I wanted to commend you on the letter you so boldly gave to your friend when he made a bad choice. I know going against your friend’s actions to stand for what is right can be difficult. In the end it’ll save you from a lot of unnecessary trouble, so keep up the good work. Remember what we tell you: you’re either on the dark side or light side. Be the jedi. Stay away from the dark.
Mom and Dad
A couple of weeks ago Marcus found out that his friend (and others) broke into an abandoned house and spray painted the walls. I was furious when I found out and immediately demanded that my kids would no longer have contact with them. Then I found out Marcus himself considered an attempt to sneak over to that abandoned house which made me more upset. Luckily for him I was leaving for work and that long quiet drive left me time to think.
During my drive I thought about how hard that must have been for Marcus – a 10 year old boy with severe ADHD and impulse control issues, a boy who loves adventure, with adrenaline led thoughts of how exciting it would be to get a glimpse of the spray paint inside – my little boy stared at the house with racing thoughts, but made the decision to walk away. I called him before going into work and apologized.
He also wrote the boy a letter. Due to the many mentions of names, I won’t be sharing it but I can promise that you’d be proud and inspired by the courage he had. More courage then I’ve ever had. He told him what a great kid he was, and warned of the consequences and how it would change his life forever. He invited him to church and volunteered me (mom) to drive him haha! He told them he still wanted to play with him, but wouldn’t if those were the activities he would engage in with the other kids.
I was amazed. Why did this happen? What was Marcus’s purpose in this situation?Personal growth within himself? A positive influence to some troubled kids? I’m not sure, but soon after that he was right back to being his normal self picking on his brothers, getting dirty, and causing trouble! So it’s baby steps, and adding little pieces to the giant puzzle of his life. All I know is that we teach our kids to love no matter what others believe or do, that they are no better then anyone else, and to be accepting and forgiving. As for those kids – it’s been discussed and handled, playtime is limited, is always on our soil, and we’re within earshot. Helicopter parents for the win…..this time at least! As for me and my immediate response of anger and jumping to conclusions quickly (totally bad example) – I’m working on that too.